I almost committed a felony

Okay it wasn't a felony. It wasn't even a misdemeanor, however I'm pretty sure it would have been classified as shoplifting. All I know is that this morning I was minding my own business in the cafeteria at work, adding some sliced almonds and raisins to my bowl of oatmeal, when I looked up and I saw... it. An old fashioned glazed donut sitting amongst the rather mundane bakery items spread out like a lady in a dirty magazine and giving me come hither eyes like I was the only woman alive. I instantly began to salivate and my gut told me that I had to have it and I had to have it NOW.

For one brief moment I thought, "I could just take that. No one would even know. They would think I'd already bought it and I could just take it to my desk and eat it and no one would be the wiser". I even looked to see if the lady working the register was looking my way to see if she'd try to stop me if I grabbed it and bolted.

Logically I knew I couldn't actually buy the donut (I had money in my hands if I needed it) because the cashier knows I'm a diabetic (so is she) and she knows I'm also in the Biggest Loser competition at work so I wasn't supposed to have those kind of foods. There was NO WAY I was going to actually purchase that donut and humiliate myself by showing my weakness so instead I pondered snatching it into my grubby fingers and hightailing to my desk so I could shove it in my mouth in two bites or less to get rid of the evidence.

I quickly backed away from the counter, clutched my bowl of oatmeal to my chest, and got the hell out of there..I'm much too pretty for prison.