Current Weight: 347.5/Pounds Lost Since Last Week: 7.5

I had to delay my weigh in until Monday as my scale is still at work and I didn't come in to the office on Friday due to pretty bad back pain.. :( I think (no, I know) I overdid it at water aerobics on Wednesday last week and by the time I woke up Friday morning my back was killing me! On the plus side it only hurt to sit or lay down so I cleaned my house most of Friday since standing seemed to relieve some of the pressure. I was so surprised to see such a huge weight loss (7.5 lbs, woo hoo!!) after the weekend I had.. Let me tell you, I didn't just fall off the wagon, I put a plastic cap and a bathing suit on and pinched my nose shut and dived off head first!

It all started with Weight Watchers Fudge Bars. *shakes fist* I've been really REALLY good about avoiding temptation lately and if I don't purchase the item it doesn't make it past the protesting lips and into my willing belly. The other day however my mother and I stopped at the store and there they were.. the low cal fudge bars that taste amazing. They taste like a chocolate malt, does anyone remember those? You could get them at groceries store or from the ice cream man and they came in a little paper cup with a wooden spoon and they were totally the bees knees man, I loved them. I took one look and decided I needed to have them. No problem, right? I mean, I could have one a day and it could be my little treat after a good work out. I can handle that.. right? Right? .....Hello?

Cue in me, with my addictive personality. That's right, I admit it! I just quit a 15 year smoking habit (five weeks tomorrow, yay!) and I'm fully willing to admit that I'm totally addicted to binge eating as well. Only by myself though, you won't see me shovelling food in with both hands when anyone else is around! I really try not to do it but I just can't seem to help myself. I take one look at the food I love and start shovelling as fast as my hands will let me until I feel bloated and full and the guilt... oh the guilt. I hate when I do it but I just can't seem to help myself sometimes.

I did really good on Wednesday. I only had one fudge bar. Ditto for Thursday. I was doing well! Friday I called in sick and had a fudge bar for breakfast. Lunch rolls around and I have another. My brother comes over to keep me company and I figure "what the hell" and order pizza along with TWO 20 oz sodas. They weren't root beer so technically I didn't cheat on my Lent promise! (rolls eyes). I managed to pack away four large slices and begged my brother to take the rest home so I wouldn't eat the rest of the pizza. (He did) I then managed to have another fudge bar for dessert. Saturday my sister shows up to spend the day and I had another fudge bar for breakfast before she showed up. I then ordered pizza (AGAIN!) and managed to eat (through lunch and into dinner) an entire half of an extra large pizza and again two 20 oz sodas. For dessert? The last damned fudge bar. Last night I called the pizza place again (all total I paid them $65 over the last three days) and ordered a 12" sub. I managed to get somewhat of a tether on my weekend binge and only ate 1/2 of it with some Frito's and what? Two 20 oz sodas. *sigh*

Like I said, I'm surprised the scale actually went down. I may pay for this weekend by this Friday's weigh in, we'll just have to see.. I didn't work out all weekend either to try to let my back heal but I'm back in the game today and will be headed to water aerobics after work today and paying special attention to any exercises that tweak the back too much. Although I'm being hard on myself about this weekend I can't give up! I've lost a total of 9.5 pounds so far on this journey (if I count from the beginning of the Biggest Loser comp. at work it's 15 pounds) and I refuse to take them back! I've also decided no more fudge bars.. and no more "what the hell" moments either. I just can't afford to let my guard down. I know, I know, I can't be perfect. I can however acknowledge that I don't have enough self control yet to have my beloved fudge bars!